Yes, You Can Shovel With a Rake, and Other Things I Learned After Divorce

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It went about like any other divorce on the books. The painful split of everything right down the middle. This one for him and that one for me. Things you were annoyed by for years could finally go to good riddance, such as, adios to the wagon wheel.  So, naturally I wasn’t thinking about who had the shovel in June. I didn’t look for it until the snow started falling in November and I needed it.  I also needed to be to work and the bus was going to be leaving in no time at all. That’s when I had to improvise fast. I found that if you turn a rake upside down, you can move the snow from a driveway off to the side quick enough to clear a path and get the car heading down the road.

I learned that when you replace the burned out headlight for the car that you don’t remove the plastic covering from the front of the headlight, which would be the easiest way to unscrew the lightbulb and put a new one in.  On the contrary, you have to open the hood and do it from the back.  It certainly is more manly to do it that way. A girl now, she would have designed it the other way around. It was easy enough once I figured out the correct entry point.

I found that when you decide the gutters simply have to have gutter screens on, because he decided they didn’t need them and tore them all off one day, that you will have to get on the ladder and do it yourself unless you want to pay someone a fortune to do a pretty simple job.  The hard part was working up the courage to get up on the ladder with my corded, not cordless, electric drill and prepare to screw in the gutter guard screens. 30 minutes later and still on the first screw, I learned that the job goes much quicker if the drill is not on reverse.  It also helped when my knees weren’t shaking as much.  Chalk it up to experience.

I learned that all the previous moaning and groaning and procrastination about putting salt in the water softener is no big deal at all.  It gets poured into a giant cylinder. Based on previous person’s effort, I would have thought it went in a cup at a time.  I almost called the water softener people before I attempted it because I thought they would need to instruct me.  I decided instead to ask my Mom first, who claimed she had done it before, and when we pulled off the lid, I was amazed by the simplicity of the project.  Yes, I too could add salt to the water softener.

When the bathroom sink started leaking, I was fairly concerned. This was most likely going to require the services of a professional plumber.  Since it had been misbehaving for some time, I decided to lean on the old ex to see if he would repair a job I had asked him to do long ago.  As with most projects, he came in and stopped the damage and that is also where the work stopped.  A month later, still without a sink and imposing on my kids’ bathroom, I was tired of the bedtime battles over who got to brush their teeth first.  I decided to take matters into my own hands and go buy a new bathroom vanity.  I picked it out at Ikea, loaded it into my car, carried it in the house, unpacked it and opened the manual. Immediately, I was more than a little intimated by the 26 page instruction book and I almost stopped at page 1 when I saw this cautionary drawing.

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It was going to be just me after all and I am a girl to boot.  I don’t have anyone to call who can put a pencil behind his ear like that.  Not one to be easily deterred, I decided to see how far I could get.  I spent 3 hours on a Saturday night and while it wasn’t installed to the wall, it was assembled.  Now for the installation part of it.  This brings me back to that corded drill. I bought a pack of drill bits, but I think there’s one piece that can actually, well it has a screw end like it can screw in different types of screws.  The last time I saw it was when I put the gutter guards on in August.  But now there is a foot of snow outside and I really hope I didn’t leave it laying out there in the yard.  I don’t think I did but then I stopped by the computer to check something and the next thing I knew I was writing this blog.

I’ll keep looking for that piece for the drill, but in the meantime, I would like to note that it hasn’t even been a year and look at all the things this girl has done.  Maybe I don’t need a man in my life after all. I don’t know, they are pretty nice to have around I guess.  Just don’t tell them I know how to do all this stuff. And if they think it’s sexy to watch a girl shovel, they can apply elsewhere.

Hat Trick Birthday Wish

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GIFs are a lot of fun to make out of a series of images that you may have taken on your camera depicting some sort of action. If you do it regularly, it’s old hat to string them together, but if not, you may need a refresher course. It is relatively easy to find instructional videos these days on the internet. You will be rolling in no time if you decide to make one and know your way around Photoshop.

Here is a GIF I made of a neon hat trick signage that is at a local hockey rink that we frequent.

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©2016 Lisa Bond Photography, All rights reserved

It’s true, I could have videotaped that and avoided the whole project, but I wanted to do it, so there you have it.

On another and equally important note, it’s close to that time of the year to wish my favorite football player a happy birthday. It’s a bit early, however, since I generally post on the weekends, I wanted to make sure it was up before the big day.

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It will be awhile before the legacy ship is built. In the meantime, I hope this virtual brick will be an acceptable “substitute”. To leave an element of surprise, it will be different from the sample bricks shown here. Happy Birthday #71!

Until next time, keep warm and enjoy this peaceful time of year.

Cheerleader Potatoes

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Here in Minnesota, even the potatoes are in the spirit.

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It’s supposed to be single digit temperatures for this Sunday’s play-off game, with wind chills going below zero.  Will Seattle be able to handle this?  We are hoping the answer to that is no. It’s going to be dangerously cold. BRRRR!

Here’s to the Vikings and I hope they win!  Or we’ll be having mashed purple and gold potatoes for dinner.  I don’t know what color that will make but it’s not going to be pretty.

How Many Followers does it take to get a Like?

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I am always impressed when I see my fellow bloggers racking up “likes” left and right, accumulating them like snowflakes falling in a backyard. It seems like they are easy to come by for some people and excruciatingly difficult for others.

I’ve read perfectly good content that didn’t have a single like and couldn’t tell you why.  Similarly, I’ve seen pictures of weeds that had over one hundred likes and couldn’t explain why.

When I saw a recent post that had over 60 likes I decided to see how many people follow that blog to get a sense of the proportion of followers to likes.

It has taken me a long time to attract the followers I have and I feel rather proud to say I have over 100.  Only a couple are people I actually know in real life, the rest are followers I’ve gained along the way, who were attracted to a post that was good enough that they signed up for more. At least, that’s what my ego thought.

But the relationship was short-lived.  My kids informed me that people follow you just so you follow them back. As soon as you follow them, they stop following you.  Is that really true, I wondered? How shallow of the virtual world to do that.

This topic came up when I was bragging to one of them that a radio station had followed me.  She said yeah, but they won’t follow you for long, they’re just following you long enough for you to follow them back. They followed me too, she said. She was right. The next time I checked, they were no longer following me.  It made their numbers look good.  Such as, they have 1 billion followers but only follow 125.  So that’s how it works!

Back to the “like” ratio, so the person who racked up the cool 61 likes, it turns out after I looked at their blog, has over 12,000 followers.  That explains why my 100 followers equals 0 likes. According to the preceding example, only .005 percent of people who follow your blog like it. At that rate, I won’t be getting a like until I have about 200 followers.

I better start cranking out some better content.  Or start following a whole bunch of people so they follow me back.

Coming right up, a picture of the New Year’s Day champagne I drank while I wrote this blog.  Let’s see if either one of them gets a like.

And Happy 2016, by the way!

Last Call for Vikings Bricks

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With a pending deadline of December 31, there are only a couple days left to get your Minnesota Vikings legacy bricks.  These bricks will be part of a Vikings ship platform that fans can meander through outside of the U.S. Bank Stadium complex.

Artist’s renderings from the Vikings website look like this:

 

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The Vikings website describes the bricks and ship as quoted below:

 

Inspired by legendary Viking ships and design to honor local ancestry, the Legacy Ship on Medtronic Plaza at U.S. Bank Stadium will incorporate contemporary materials like stainless steel, stone, concrete and wood and will include landscaping, theatrical lighting and smoke effects. A 2,000 square-foot curved LED video board standing 55 feet tall with serve as the ship’s sail, while the ship’s figurehead, an abstract dragon with Norse iconography, will top out at 43 feet hight and will interact with events inside the stadium. The Legacy Ship will include seating and stainless steel railings, along with 150 linear feet of displays, including a timeline exhibit featuring historical Minnesota moments and site directories to aid in wayfinding. Making the ship even more unique will be the incorporation of fan commemorative “Legacy Bricks” that will occupy approximately 3,500 square feet of the ship’s deck.

 

The bricks are going to look like this and have the following price points:

 

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If you are thinking about this but wonder how your wording would look on a brick, you can try it out using a preview brick option.  Here are a couple I did up for fun:

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JK, no phone numbers allowed.

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Darn, I really wished I would have ordered the one with the logo. Oh well, I am happy with what I got.

Note, there are some limitations on what you can say, just to keep everything kosher.  I ordered my brick a long time ago, in fact, I was one of the first group of people to order.  I only hesitated long enough to come up with the perfect message and then I ordered it.  I will have more information on that during a special announcement in January.  Sometime around Jan. 21, I’d say.

Happy New Year!

Gas Price and Charlie Parr Alert

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This is a friendly reminder to all those businesses that raised their prices because they had to pass on the high cost of fuel.  Airlines, delivery, mail, groceries (due to transportation), etc.  In case you haven’t noticed or didn’t want to talk about it…

 

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Fuel has dropped a lot.  Lucky for us, it has been low for some time.  What do you think the odds are that all those aforementioned businesses are going to drop the cost of their goods and services now?

On another note, talented musician Charlie Parr continues to wow fans and bewilder crowds of spectators at his shows.  I wrote about an event of his I saw a year or so ago down in Mankato, MN.  Here is a link to that post:

​http://www.lisabondphotography.com/blog/this-ones-for-charlie

I will be making a trek to some old stomping grounds tomorrow night with the usual suspects to see him again and repeat the above blog.  Would love to see old and and make some new friends there.  Say hi if you are in the area and decide to add this to your calendar Friday night.  In fact, pull up a chair and join us.

Until next time, thanks for coming and hope you are enjoying the most wonderful time of the year.